GBV 101: Activity 1

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Survivor-Centric Value Setting

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Below are examples of norms & values you could include for yourself or your team, group, or workplace:

Example Norm 1

Leave your bias at the door. We will not tolerate any hateful language or harmful language in this space.

Tip: It is essential here that you break down what would happen if someone did bring bias or hateful speech into the space? What is the plan or action?
Example action: You may be placed in a waiting room and staff will come to join you to check-in and chat a bit to see if we can resume the session or if we need a break from the group.
Example action: You may be removed from the chat and staff will follow up with you within 24 hours.

Example Norm 2

Listen and try to stay engaged in a meaningful way. It is not about debating unless given consent. It is not about changing the person's mind or feelings; we are here to listen to one another and hold space for learning.

Tip: We use this acronym to help us at times:
WAIT! - Why, Am, I, Talking?

Suggestions for survivor-centred norms & values:

  1. Survivor-centred means believing survivors.
    Do you have a line in your norms and values about how a survivor or person can check-in if they are feeling harassed or witnessing potentially harmful or abusive behaviour?

  2. Have you given folks some resources through language or actions?

    For example: Sometimes you might fumble through these topics, but it is OK to pause, ask clarifying questions, and connect in a more meaningful way. Sometimes, these pauses make a huge difference. It is OK to say, "I am pausing because I just don't know what to say," or "I am pausing because I want to learn more from you." We do not judge people for taking the time to absorb new information.

  3. Be accountable.
    If you are in conflict with someone or you caused harm, be truthful and accountable. You can approach accountability by trying to say and mean things like:
    I'm sorry what I said/did hurt you, offended you, made you upset. I acknowledge it was wrong.
    What accountability do you want to see from me? I will work to do better.
    Can I check back in with you about this later, or do you want to talk more about it now?

  4. Keep your camera on as much as you can if you are holding an event online.
    This helps everyone feel safer knowing who is in the space and how they are doing in that space. If you need to turn your camera off to harm reduce or take a break or anything else, that is OK.

  5. Set boundaries to mitigate harm.
    Do you know what you and your team need to feel safer in this space?

 

Once you have your values/norms established, ask yourself:

  1. Do you have to send these norms and values before the event, during, or after?

  2. Are you going to take time before the session/event/meeting to go over this with everyone?

  3. How are you collecting feedback on this?

  4. Are you willing to change and adapt the norms and values based on feedback or requests for changes? 

  5. Did you mention accessibility and accommodation? Many people feel excellent when they know what physical environment they are coming into, online or in person. 

  6. Did you prepare where there need to be trigger or content warnings?

 

Reflection Questions

What would you add as values or norms you would like to see in your workplace, spaces, etc.?

 
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